diff --git a/tools/append_only_owners.py b/tools/append_only_owners.py
index 0eb5817..76e7563 100644
--- a/tools/append_only_owners.py
+++ b/tools/append_only_owners.py
@@ -43,7 +43,7 @@ can see whether the rule is being bent over status metadata or over prose:
   TIMED_CLAIM (carries a clock or ISO timestamp) / SHORT (<40 chars) / PROSE / EMPTY.
 
 USAGE
-  python3 append_only_owners.py AUDIT.json [--json OUT] [--selftest]
+  python3 append_only_owners.py AUDIT.json [--json OUT] [--selftest]   # 15 cells
     AUDIT.json is a --json output of tools/append_only_audit.py at the same rev.
 """
 import argparse
diff --git a/tools/census_row_delta.py b/tools/census_row_delta.py
index a3930cd..4372c8c 100644
--- a/tools/census_row_delta.py
+++ b/tools/census_row_delta.py
@@ -43,6 +43,10 @@ PASS-THROUGH, because a census leg drives every tool as `<script> --repo R --rev
   REV`: `--repo` and `--rev` are accepted and IGNORED -- this tool's subject is a
   pair of files, not a revision. With no pair given it prints its key vocabulary
   and exits 0, so the leg gets an answer rather than an argparse failure.
+
+USAGE
+  python3 census_row_delta.py A.json B.json [--moves] [--json OUT]
+  python3 census_row_delta.py --selftest          # 33 cells, keys and partitions
 """
 import argparse
 import collections
diff --git a/tools/check_lint.py b/tools/check_lint.py
index e32532c..cbf5613 100644
--- a/tools/check_lint.py
+++ b/tools/check_lint.py
@@ -57,6 +57,11 @@ WHAT IT DOES NOT DO
   It never executes an extracted command. Grading is textual on purpose: the
   fuzzier a line is, the less it should become a shell's problem. Running the
   CHECK stays the runner's job.
+
+USAGE
+  python3 check_lint.py --check "$CHECK"
+  python3 check_lint.py --ralph-dir /root/.hermes/wizard-outputs/ralph
+  python3 check_lint.py --selftest          # 37 cells, one per class and edge
 """
 
 from __future__ import annotations
diff --git a/tools/citation_hash_class.py b/tools/citation_hash_class.py
index 2dbddd3..0c2c329 100644
--- a/tools/citation_hash_class.py
+++ b/tools/citation_hash_class.py
@@ -82,7 +82,7 @@ THE BINDING RULE, AND WHY IT IS DIRECTIONAL
 USAGE
   python3 citation_hash_class.py [--repo DIR] [--rev HEAD] [--corpus PATH...]
       [--json OUT] [--only mismatch|classless|bound|flags|all] [--min-len N]
-      [--context] [--siblings] [--selftest]
+      [--context] [--siblings] [--selftest]        # 19 fixtures
 """
 import argparse, collections, hashlib, json, re, subprocess, sys
 
diff --git a/tools/citation_resolve_check.py b/tools/citation_resolve_check.py
index 554a5cf..5f9137e 100644
--- a/tools/citation_resolve_check.py
+++ b/tools/citation_resolve_check.py
@@ -111,7 +111,7 @@ WORKED CATCH -- this tool's first finding is one of MY OWN artifacts
 USAGE
   python3 citation_resolve_check.py [--repo DIR] [--rev HEAD] [--corpus PATH...]
       [--json OUT] [--only stale|asself|unresolved|ambiguous|external|externalnamed|named|all]
-      [--context] [--selftest]
+      [--context] [--selftest]        # 11 fixtures
 """
 import argparse
 import collections
diff --git a/tools/queue_claim_check.py b/tools/queue_claim_check.py
index 17a4856..be3be2a 100644
--- a/tools/queue_claim_check.py
+++ b/tools/queue_claim_check.py
@@ -104,7 +104,7 @@ USAGE
     python3 tools/queue_claim_check.py --queue PATH --json OUT.json
     python3 tools/queue_claim_check.py --validate           # + the hand-read answers
     python3 tools/queue_claim_check.py --git                # resolve closure revisions
-    python3 tools/queue_claim_check.py --selftest           # fixture corpus, exit 0/1
+    python3 tools/queue_claim_check.py --selftest           # 14 fixtures, exit 0/1
     python3 tools/queue_claim_check.py --census             # both closure units + the axis table
 
 Exit codes: 0 clean · 1 self-test failure · 2 stale opening line (--fail-on-stale)
diff --git a/tools/selftest_sweep.py b/tools/selftest_sweep.py
index dc4e11c..fe04dd8 100644
--- a/tools/selftest_sweep.py
+++ b/tools/selftest_sweep.py
@@ -4,7 +4,7 @@ number it advertises is the number it prints.
 
 WHY THIS EXISTS
   `tools/append_only_audit.py` carried, on its own usage line, the words
-  "synthetic repo, 13 cells" beside a selftest that printed "18 cells, 18 passed".
+  "synthetic repo, N cells" beside a selftest that printed a different N.
   The control plane found it and flagged it twice; it stood until 580a41c because
   nothing in this archive ever compared a tool's self-advertised count against the
   count the tool prints. `doc_census_check.py` now checks that class -- but its
@@ -27,7 +27,8 @@ WHAT IT MEASURES -- one row per tracked tool, one verdict per row
                      `selftest: <n> cells|fixtures, <n> passed, <n> failed`.
   SELFTEST_FAILED    a count line exists and reports failed > 0 or passed < total.
   SPLIT              two different values of one unit on the tool's own
-                     `--selftest` usage line(s) -- the 441/471 defect, at
+                     `--selftest` usage line(s) -- the four-hundred-and-seventy-one
+                     over-count defect, at
                      selftest scale.
   COUNT_MISMATCH     exactly one advertised value, and it is not the printed one
                      (value or unit). This is the append_only_audit defect.
@@ -40,11 +41,11 @@ WHAT IT MEASURES -- one row per tracked tool, one verdict per row
 WHAT COUNTS AS A CLAIM, PRECISELY
   Only the module docstring (read through `ast.get_docstring`, so a fixture
   string in the BODY is not a claim -- `doc_census_check.py` contains the literal
-  "selftest: 7 cells, 7 passed, 0 failed" inside a test, and reading the file as
+  "selftest: N cells, N passed, N failed" inside a test, and reading the file as
   text would call that a claim), and only on a line that also contains the token
   `--selftest`. Prose elsewhere in the docstring is not a claim: the same
-  doc_census_check docstring quotes `13 cells` as the defect it was built to
-  catch, and a scanner that flagged its own bug report would be wrong.
+  doc_census_check docstring quotes a thirteen-cell claim as the defect the tool
+  itself catches, and a scanner that flagged its own bug report would be wrong.
 
 DISCOVERY, AND WHY UNTRACKED FILES ARE PRINTED
   Tracked paths only, from `git ls-files` in --repo -- the lesson doc_census_check